Receiving the diagnosis of mesothelioma[1] is a shocking development for an entire family. Not only does it have a massive impact on the individual who was once exposed to asbestos[2] and receives the diagnosis, it also has a profound impact on the rest of their loved ones. This is a trying time, to be sure, and everyone will feel motivated to do what they can to help out. 

Most of that help is going to come in the form of emotional support. The medical side of things will be managed by the healthcare professionals who are offering treatment, so loved ones will be left to do what they can to help the affected individual stay positive, enjoy the things they have in life, and cherish their time around others. 

If you find yourself currently in the position of needing to support a loved one during this type of difficult situation, there is no overstating the significance of the situation. It’s a challenging place to be, and we’d like to at least offer some basic advice that might help you make the most out of this phase of life. 

Facing the Reality

Unfortunately, we are going to have to start this discussion with a sobering reality about the situation at hand. If a loved one has been diagnosed with mesothelioma, it’s likely that the disease is at a relatively advanced stage, and they may have as little as just a few months left to live. While it’s possible to survive for a few years with this disease, this outcome is not common. Treatments can be used to improve the chances of a longer survival, but most of these cases do not end well. 

The harsh outlook for a mesothelioma[3] is something that will be hard for loved ones to accept. You will need to go through your own grieving process as part of this journey, and it’s okay to give yourself time to break down and let the emotions overcome you. While you are likely focused on providing support to the family member that is sick, you still need to provide yourself with some space to process what is happening, as well. 

Putting Together a Plan

Realistically, you aren’t going to be “getting over” this matter anytime soon, and that is understandable. However, there will be a point when you start to gain a bit of clarity on the situation and you start to think about how the matter can be approached in everyone’s best interests. It’s going to be hard, but you’ll finally be ready to move forward with putting together a plan that is going to offer your loved one the support and strength they badly need at this time. 

As you start to plan how you’ll offer support, think about the following:

·       Who else can help? It’s possible that you’ll be the sole supportive figure for your loved one. Hopefully, however, that isn’t the case, and you’ll have some other family members or close friends who can also step in. As you are planning out the support you are going to provide, think about how individuals can come together, perhaps at different times and in different ways. For example, someone might be better suited to having deeper conversations about life, where another person might be more comfortable in a distracting role, allowing the person to escape for a while and think about something else entirely. Playing to the strengths of everyone in the group is the best way to approach the situation.

·       How much help will be desired? Believe it or not, it’s easy to go overboard while trying to help someone in this situation. If you provide them with too much attention, your efforts might actually have a negative effect as they might not be comfortable with how they are being treated. So, think about the person who is sick, understand their personality, and come up with an appropriate plan that will make sure they don’t feel alone while still giving them the space that might be required for a clear head and deep thoughts.

·       Do you need help? You’ll likely feel like you want to be strong and put on a brave face but remember that you can only be helpful if you are engaging in your own self-care. So, think about whether or not you need to get some additional mental health support. There is no shame at all in acknowledging that you need help to be at your best for someone important in your life. 

The time you spend planning could wind up paying off nicely for as long as you need to provide support in this situation. Of course, as things change, and the realities of the situation evolves, it might be necessary to revisit the plan from time to time. 

Tailor Your Support to the Individual

Everyone is unique, and the kind of support that is desired by one person might not be suitable for another. So, as you work through this process, be sure to always keep the loved one that you are caring for in mind and think about how their personality plays into what kind of support they’ll need. 

Some will be open to having long, emotional talks where you reminisce about times past, cry together, and open up fully. Others may not be as emotionally unavailable, and instead they’ll simply appreciate having someone to talk to and tend to their more immediate needs. 

Remember, even if there are certain things you would like to talk about, it’s never best to push up against the wishes of your loved one. Always consider whether the conversation will benefit them during this time. 

Addressing Practical Concerns

Mental health support is likely to be your primary objective in this process. You’ll want to be with the loved one that is facing mesothelioma, so they don’t feel alone during what is sure to be the most challenging period of their life. With that said, as important as mental health is, there are also some practical, day-to-day action items that may be needed. Getting organized on these points and figuring out how they will be navigated in the weeks and months ahead is going to be equally as important. 

Again, the steps you need to take are going to depend on the situation at hand and the care being provided, but here are some important considerations: 

Make home as comfortable as possible. 

It might be necessary to make some adjustments to your loved one’s living space to make sure they are comfortable and can get around as easily as possible. Mesothelioma and the treatment for it can come along with some very difficult side effects, including some that significantly degrade a person’s comfort and quality of life. Making some changes to improve the way their home works for their new reality is a big step in the right direction.

Getting to and from the doctor. 

There are sure to be plenty of appointments to attend in the upcoming weeks and months as your loved one starts to receive treatment for mesothelioma. If they can’t drive themselves, it will be necessary to arrange for reliable transportation. This could mean you or another loved one driving them to appointments, or it could mean scheduling a ride with a service that is designed to fill this need.

Learning about mesothelioma. 

While not necessary, you might decide that you want to educate yourself on everything that mesothelioma is and what it does to the human body. Arming yourself with information can help you anticipate what might be coming down the road for your loved one, and what you might be able to do to make them more comfortable and get as much enjoyment out of life as possible. Learning about potential symptoms and outcomes can also help you provide more informed support at healthcare appointments and/or aid in further explaining information to the patient that is shared by doctors and other medical personnel. 

One other practical point is to make sure that you have enough time for yourself in this process, especially if you are the one providing most or all of the care. You won’t be at your best if you are always “on duty,” especially if you need to provide emotional support in addition to doing practical things like scheduling appointments, serving as transportation, and more. 

As these obligations take up more and more of your time – and a significant portion of your emotional energy – try to carve out space to get away and do something else. That could mean turning over these duties temporarily to another family member or friend, or it could mean looking for space in the budget to hire a professional caregiver. 

Carving Out Space for Regular Life

There is nothing “regular” about dealing with a mesothelioma diagnosis and the treatment that is to follow. This is a tremendous challenge, to be sure, and an event that will change the course of everyone’s life in the entire family. It’s not realistic to just deny that reality and pretend that it doesn’t exist, but it’s also not necessary to allow it to take over every single area of life moving forward.

One of the best ways to support someone in the difficult position of dealing with mesothelioma is to help them get a taste of everyday life as often as possible. Between the many appointments they’ll likely need to attend, and the frequency with which they will be talking about their illness with others, it can feel like their whole world is revolving around this disease. To be able to step away from that and spend time focusing on something else can serve as a huge relief. 

Planning a course of action during mesothelioma treatment

Of course, there will likely be some restrictions on what is possible to be done with a person who is already dealing with the effects of mesothelioma and weakened immunity. They may be struggling to breathe normally when exerting even at a low level, so anything too physically demanding might not be a wise choice. Anything that seems to put their body in additional discomfort should be avoided, as you don’t want to stress their system any more than what is already happening. And being especially mindful of germs during this time can help ensure their safety. 

Fortunately, in today’s digital world, there are plenty of options for activities that don’t demand being too physically active. Is your loved one a sports fan? Plan on having a small gathering with some friends or other family members to watch a big game and focus only on the event, rather than the disease and what it means for the future. Or, maybe it would be fun for them to have a few people over to play board games, or to prepare a favorite meal. Obviously, the kinds of things that will be appealing are going to vary on a case-by-case basis, so use your in-depth knowledge of the person to customize activities to fit their preferences. 

Finding joy in moments and loved ones

Providing some sense of normalcy doesn’t always have to involve inviting people over or having some kind of event. It can also mean simply talking about something else from time to time. Instead of sitting around talking about being sick, they might appreciate talking about topics they’re passionate about. It is, of course, necessary and important to keep up with treatment for mesothelioma and follow along with doctor’s orders, but finding some pattern of normal life apart from that is a critical part of this process. 

Latency of Mesothelioma and Asbestos-Related Diseases

Asbestos diseases usually take at least five years to appear, so asbestos companies tried to deny their employees’ workers compensation claims as being too late to be enforced.

As early as the 1960s, Johns Manville knew many industrial workers were dying from mesothelioma from asbestos exposure, but they resisted admitting it, and fought every attempt to regulate asbestos or recover compensation for asbestos injuries, right until they went bankrupt.

Many who experienced second-hand asbestos exposure are only now realizing that they were exposed from regular contact with their spouse or parent’s industrial work clothes.

Considering Legal Action

As much as you probably don’t want to think about it at this time, there is a financial component to this situation that will have to be faced at one point or another. There are many issues that can arise with mesothelioma that are related to money, including:

Loss of income. 

If the affected individual was still working in some capacity, a diagnosis of mesothelioma will likely mean they won’t be able to work for much longer. That can be a major problem for a family that was relying on their income to pay the bills. Some type of change will have to be made to figure out how that income will be replaced in the long run.

Medical costs. 

Even with insurance, the cost of care for mesothelioma can be overwhelming. As the treatments add up, the bills are going to become significant, and may be more than the family can reasonably handle.

Other expenses. 

There might be other costs that are incurred along the way, such as hotel bills if a loved one needs to stay near a hospital, or travel expenses for family members who want to visit. 

The list above should make it clear that this diagnosis is not only going to take a major impact on life as a whole, but especially on finances. With that in mind, it’s important to think about taking legal action to seek damages that may be deserved in this case. If the diagnosis of mesothelioma stems directly from exposure to asbestos[4] that was the fault of another party, compensation could be available. 

Some families decide not to take legal action because they assume that a long, difficult court battle would be waiting – but that’s not necessarily the case. There are large asbestos trusts already in place that hold funds that are waiting to be claimed by victims. You will still need to provide detailed information and follow an established process to make a claim, but it’s much faster and not nearly as difficult as going through a traditional lawsuit. Asbestos trusts can be an excellent way to secure fair compensation for the family in a timely manner. 

Finding strength and getting help where it is available

Supporting a loved one during their battle with mesothelioma in the aftermath of asbestos[5] exposure is a noble endeavor, and one that is sure to come along with plenty of emotional moments for everyone involved. By standing up to this disease and helping your loved one fight back, you are truly making a world of difference. And, while it might not seem like financial matters are particularly important at this stage, it is worthwhile to explore the legal options that might be available to your family as a result of what has happened. 

Nearly all cases of mesothelioma are the result of asbestos exposure, and someone should be held responsible for that mistake. Securing compensation isn’t going to undo what has been done, sadly, but it can help the family move forward. Get started today to learn more about the options that are available in your case.

[1] https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0013935122018576

[2] https://www.mdpi.com/1660-4601/10/11/5629/pdf

[3] https://www.govinfo.gov/content/pkg/CHRG-110shrg61969/html/CHRG-110shrg61969.htm

[4] https://www.lung.org/clean-air/at-home/indoor-air-pollutants/asbestos

[5] https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/causes-prevention/risk/substances/asbestos/asbestos-fact-sheet